Instruments of Sabotage
Short musings in the midst of a crazy schedule
Hi!
I wasn't planning to write you this week. In fact, I almost added a P.S. last week saying something along the lines of, "Next week is going to be a crazy mother, so you probably won't hear from me until the following one."
And then some stuff happened, and I decided to write about it. I pinched and zoomed my schedule, smoothed it out, and managed to carve out a few minutes here and there to put together not only a blog post but some other important things as well.
The week is still a crazy mother, so I'll be quick, but there are a few things worth sharing.
Thing #1: To say I was disappointed when I wrote to you last week is a bit of an understatement. I was prepared to win a prize in that writing competition, because I'd received a confidential email saying I was in consideration for a prize. Unfortunately, the email didn't specify which level of prize, so I guess I let my imagination get away from me. My bad. When my name was on the list of honorable mentions, I was pleased. But still disappointed.
Later that day, though, it was brought to my attention that, more than being an honorable mention, the story actually had been a semi-finalist. Just a step away from winning the category. There is no material difference between honorable mention and semi-finalist. Unless you consider my ego, that is. Something about that word made me feel more validated. Silly, maybe, and it's not like I'm going to do anything differently (except for adding "award-winning" as an adjective on all the profiles), but there's no accounting for the way a simple phrase can change your perspective.
Also, they gave me a cool badge on my story. Check it out.
Thing #2: Motherhood hasn't gotten any easier.
Thing #3: I sold a pitch this week that I've been thinking about writing for years. It's about how, when we become parents, the way we can grieve begins to mold around our children. I spent 45 minutes writing and sobbing the other day, thinking about some very personal losses over the years. There will be a lot more tears as I finish and edit the piece. It's felt good, getting a chance to process some of these things. But also, it sucks when people you love die.
That's all for today. I need to get back to my math work, which continues to be just freaking awesome.
Until next time,
P.S. No time for cleverness today. Share this newsletter with someone who will enjoy it. I know there's someone. If each of you share with just one person, my audience will DOUBLE! Which is pretty cool to think about. I've you've been sent here by a friend, click the button to subscribe.
P.P.S. Have you followed me yet on the socials? Twitter|Facebook|Instagram